Multiples SHOULD be treated as a unit.

I have read countless articles written by parenting experts and listened to advice from well-meaning acquaintances on the topic of multiples and how they need to be treated as individuals. The common theme suggests that parents give their twins/triplets or more one on one time regularly to establish their sense of individuality. I beg to differ.

As a mother of 8 year old triplet boys I made a decision to stop feeling guilty about giving them 'one on one' time with Mommy and Daddy. We barely have time alone with each other let alone have spend individual time with each child. That's not to say that we don't ever have one on one time but when we do its probably more of a treat for the parent than for the child. A few hours are okay but longer than that and they start to ask about their siblings.

Even if we did have time, we probably wouldn't on any type of regular basis. Unless you are a parent of multiples its very hard to understand. Siblings born at different times automatically get their alone time with parents but multiples do not know any different. They arrive in the World at almost the same moment and from the first breath have a constant companion (s).

I believe that even as young infants multiples are aware that they are part of a group, a unit that is very special. As they grow older it becomes apparent that they are more comfortable with each other than other children although they are still capable of making friends. This doesn't mean to say they don't squabble frequently!

If you are new parents of multiples I can garuntee you will feel a certain sense of missing out on that one on one time that other parents enjoy with individual siblings but at the same time being a part of the unit you have created is one of the most wonderful feelings in the World. Enjoy every crazy second!

How It Feels To Be A Nanny

How It Feels To Be a Nanny (For One of the Best Families in Town)

By Katelin Hill

Their mother is going to kill me, I thought as I scrubbed the black crayon off of the floor in vain, only smearing it further. My first day nannying for three toddlers had been spent thus far getting to know the kids, and the second their mother left me alone to go upstairs to relax, BAM—a Picasso, on a canvas of hardwood floor, with a medium of Crayola crayon. That's when I smelled it. Another child had left a little creation of their own in their diaper. I dropped what I was doing to tend to that.

I was holding toddler number two's feet with one hand and a clean diaper in the other when I realized that toddler number three had found the crayon I had neglected to hide, and was decorating the woven clothes hamper. I had to watch the mural unfold as I finished what I was doing, deciding I would rather have crayon on the walls than what toddler number two had to offer.

Since that day, I learned a lot of important lessons. Mr. Clean Magic Erasers, for example, should always be kept on hand as they are pure concentrated genius encapsulated in a single several-use sponge. I also learned that a good employer will not kill you over a mini-fiasco such as the one on my first day, and a great employer, such as the one I had, will giggle and tell you that was actually a very mild day in their household, and if that was all that had happened on my first day I should consider myself lucky.

Two years later, I still have yet to beat the feeling I get when I walk through their door and am welcomed by 3 pairs of feet, several sizes bigger than that fateful day, come scrambling to the door for hugs and screaming my name. During the last two years I don't think I have ever been able to get the theme song to Peep and the Big Wide World out of my head (and clapped my hands four times in the appropriate places). I've replaced choice grown-up words by exclaiming “oh fudge!” when a toddler runs right over my fingers while wearing their heaviest sneakers. I've been hugged by dripping wet children fresh out of the kiddy pool with no change of clothes on hand and put Band-Aids on bruises because sometimes it's just not worth it to argue with a three year old if a Nemo Band-Aid is all it will take for him to feel better. Although on the one hand the kids have been highly predictable little beings there was never a shortage of surprises. For example, when I ask one of my babies what he wants for dinner, the answer will never not be “grilled cheese.” Yet when I caught another kid I've recently started watching wiping boogers all over construction paper in place of paint, I can't say I was expecting that.

I have a lot of respect for parents. On several occasions I've arrived home after particularly long days and instead of relaxing kept thinking, “oh crud, where did the kids go?” I think this is how most parents probably feel daily. When I put my toddlers on bikes when they were just starting to learn to ride them I thought my heart was going to pound right through my chest. And the first time we took them to Kidsburg? I think my blood pressure steadily rose the whole hour we were there. That is one terrifying place. Ladders are dangerous, ropes are an accident waiting to happen, and if a bigger kid even looks at one of my babies the wrong way then it's time to mosey on over to a quieter area. Many people have told me I'm going to be the mother one day who keeps her kids enclosed in a protective bubble. There's an idea.

Nannying has been a great experience, and one of the most important things is to find the right family. This family and I were a perfect fit. One of the greatest compliments I've ever received was from the toddlers' mom. She walked into the house a few months after I had started working for her and told me she had forgotten her cell phone, but she told me “when I realized you couldn't call me, I thought, it's okay, because if anything happens Katelin can handle it.” She said that she hadn't trusted anyone like that with the kids, other than her own mother. I have to say though; I do probably raid the refrigerator a lot more than her mother.

It seems like forever ago I was making sure peas didn't get shoved up nostrils and that diapers stayed on their bottoms instead of wherever they felt like ripping them off to leave somewhere for me to step on. They have grown out of their diapers and cribs and gone through about 30 pairs of shoes each, each of which fit them for about a week before another growth spurt hit. They ride the school bus. My babies aren't really babies (and I guess technically they're not “mine”) but big kids now, and I look forward to watching them grow up as long as I have the privilege too.

My thoughts about nanny wages

I recently worked with a family who used the Williamsburg Nanny Agency on a previous occasion. They had been delighted with the nanny who unfortunately had to leave to move to a different state. During our first meeting I explained that the hourly nanny rate they could expect to pay for a professional nanny was a minimum of $12 to $14. Experience has taught me that its better to manage a client's expectations by being upfront and telling the truth.

I could tell they weren't keen on the idea of paying more than $10 per hour but I explained that in the case of hiring a nanny the old adage of 'you get what you pay for' could never be more true. Anyway, to cut a long story short I sent them eight strong candidates with excellent nanny experience and they ended up hiring a nanny they found on their own through a nanny website.

Naturally, I blamed myself for doing a poor job and not finding the right nanny (rare for me) only to find out from the ex-nanny that they hired an inexperienced illegal immigrant and paid her $9/hr which in some ways, was a relief to hear because I realized that despite the fact they were prepared to pay my fee they didn't want to pay the nanny anything above $10.

I truly hope it all works out for them for the children's sake if nothing else but why do we pay so little for childcare? I can understand if parent's are struggling to support a family and money is an issue but in the case of a professional couple, living in an upmarket neighborhood and driving nice cars why do they turn into Scrooge when it comes to their own children?

A good nanny works hard and earns every penny. So why is nanny work so underpaid? I like to see myself as an advocate for helping to increase nanny wages. Last week, two nannies sent me emails telling me their hourly rate had been increased. They were so excited! Just think how much happier they will be around the children they care for and how much more likely they are to stay with the family. We all know that children need consistency in order to thrive and taking care of a nanny can be the best way to provide it.